Narcissists Cause Cognitive Dissonance – Here’s How to Destroy It, For Good
Here's how to resolve the cognitive dissonance the narcissist left you with in ways that that benefit you.
Narcissists Cause Cognitive Dissonance - Here’s How To Destroy It, For Good
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"In the realm of intimate partner violence, studies show that abuse victims who are bonded to their abusers (abusers who tend to have antisocial or narcissistic traits) may maladaptively resolve their cognitive dissonance by minimizing or justifying the abuser’s behavior to cope with the trauma of the abuse, engage in self-blame, or reinterpret the aggression in a way that allows for positive feelings about the abuser to continue (i.e. “They were just joking. They didn’t mean it like that”). They may also blame the abuse on an external source, such as substances. It is also clear that narcissistic abusers use gaslighting tactics to blameshift and to evade accountability for their abuse, which can instill or exacerbate self-blame. In this article, learn the powerful ways you can cognitively reframe your experiences with a narcissistic or psychopathic abuser to resolve cognitive dissonance in ways that protect and benefit yourself instead." - Shahida Arabi, MA
I think I'm missing that "denial-excuse-dismiss gene" because I actually did call out Narcissist's behaviors & never looked the other way, especially after Narc boyfriend insulted my boss to his face while at a dinner & told him that he (my boss,) "looked like Norman Bates." After I blew up, the Narc repeatedly said: "I did not call him Norman Bates! I called him Anthony Perkins!" It's not in my nature to ignore whatever "elephant might be in the room..." Unfortunately, I was "Young-Easy-Prey" back then. I went running to my very first therapy session back in 1992 (clueless & confused) asking: "I met a guy who has some of the traits I was looking for in a future partner, but I'm confused about his behaviors.... etc." & all I got from the Marital/Relationship Therapists was the: "It Takes Two to Tango" philosophy, so they just redirected & refocused the therapy on me alone (which was helpful in some ways like understanding myself better to gain self-improvement) but I never got to address the issues/problems with the Narcissist. So I went to therapist #3, #4, #5... with the Narc himself & got the (same "Two to Tango") -- plus the therapy was going nowhere: they set no therapy goals, no review of progress; no solutions, no deadlines back then & I wasted money & gained nothing except more frustration & confusion thinking I somehow had a role in the Narc's "confusing" behaviors. So much for Cognitive Dissonance back in the early 90's... :(